The comfort zone. It can be such a satisfying place to be. It’s like a cocoon. Safe. Cozy. Familiar. But just like a cocoon, there’s not a lot room to move around. After a while, that same safe, cozy place that you’ve come to enjoy can start to make you feel claustrophobic. There’s no more room to grow; you’re stuck in a perpetual state of sameness. The good news is, it’s not a permanent state of being: it’s temporary. And when you’re ready, you emerge transformed: greater and more glorious than ever. This is what it’s like to go through a transition.
If you’ve gotten a chance to read my story, then you already know why I made the decision to transition to natural hair. When I first started my transition, I wasn’t really sure what to expect; to my delight and surprise, a hair care decision opened up a door to an online community of really supportive women who were on similar journeys.
After doing some research on transitioning and natural hair care, I soon became a regular on the forums at napturallycurly.com. It’s a welcoming, judgement-free zone that’s both helpful and fun. I found a place I could go to ask questions, get hairstyle inspiration, product recommendations – you name it. It was amazing to be able to share experiences with women from all over the world. I am eternally grateful to Lisa, who created the site, as well as all the wonderful ladies on the forums.
As time went on, I learned a lot about caring for my hair in its natural state, and eventually felt comfortable enough to offer advice to newer transitioners. I started sharing encouragement more than anything, but also lessons I’d learned through trial and error. I’ve always enjoyed helping others, and I knew from (very recent) experience that transitioning was not always easy.
In addition to the new community I found online, I was fortunate to have friends who didn’t question my decision to transition: but not everyone is that lucky. Many women experience ridicule and discouragement from those closest to them which can lead to hurt feelings, strained relationships, and a blow to one’s self-confidence. When the people we trust fail to support us during times of transition, it can be really hurtful. Unfortunately, if a woman is already on the fence and not 100% confident in her decision to transition to natural hair, this lack of support can discourage her from continuing her transition.
The thing about transitioning is that you have to step out of your comfort zone. You have to be okay with some discomfort and awkwardness. There are going to be days where you just don’t like the way your hair looks. You have to grow a thick skin. You can’t expect everyone around you to support, or even understand your decision. It’s a process – and not always an easy one. Even the word “transition” indicates a change or transformation from something old into something new.
It’s important to be true to yourself. Remind yourself daily why you’re doing it, and never lose sight of your end goal and the good that will come out the process. If you can’t find a support system within your own circle, then I encourage you to seek it elsewhere – it really helps! Fortunately, the internet makes it pretty easy to connect with people who can relate to your situation and provide that encouragement and support.
We all go through transitions at some point or another. I’m about to go through one myself, which I’ll be sharing with you soon. Have you gone through a transition lately? Did it test your self-confidence? Make you tougher? More adaptable? Did you find that any of the lessons learned were relevant to other areas of your life? Let me know!
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